the truth hit me over the head like a frying pan
I hate to link and run, but:
Jesus can appear on your pancakes every day if you buy the Jesus Pan (only $29.99 for two!).
It looks kind of fake at first but a cursory glance around the interwebs seems to indicate it’s for real (feel free to prove me wrong). In any case, I’d be tempted to get one but I don’t make pancakes really ever and I have to admit I’d prefer it if the visage of the Son of God weren’t so dour. A little more along the lines of Buddy Christ, maybe.
Tomorrow’s garage sales may reveal more Saviour kitsch, I do not know. If they do, I won’t be able to tell you about it until Sunday, however, as I’m going camping with the People Love Forgot. No beer, but high-on-Jesus life hijinks should ensue nonetheless.